Day 22: Career Day, I think I overdid it again maybe... and I miss being able to snuggle.

So I woke up at 7:30ish this morning because I had committed (a while back) to doing a career day presentation at a local school.  It was really cold outside, so I had to rethink my wardrobe choice, which was okay but I also had to reach up really high in the closet to get to the bin my comfy sweater was packed in... which probably wasn't the best idea ever.  Ouch.  I went with the big comfy sweater and some athletic leggings (they're all black, so they looked fashiony enough).

We had packed the car last night so that there would be no carrying-of-stuff this morning, I knew Mr. Right needed to snooze in a while because he had a long day of work travel ahead of him.  I got ready, and with it being cold, my left nipple was REALLY being crazy and sensitive, so I took some Motrin on the way out the door.   Seriously, left nipple, you have GOT to calm the heck down.

My fantastic helper friend met me at the school and took care of the heavy-thing-transporting, got us checked in, and helped me set up everything in the room.  We walked back to the cafeteria where the students were assembling, listened to the opening presentation, then walked back to the classroom where we'd set up.

No, I am not a professional cupcake model, but this blog is anonymous so that's what you get, lol.

I talked to three separate "classes", each of which lasted 30 minutes.  I stood up and talked, I sat down and talked, whatever felt comfortable.  It didn't involve a great deal of physical effort, really.  The kids were GREAT, I loved talking about my job, and my fantastic helper friend threw out candy whenever someone made a good comment or asked a question, so the flow of conversation was lovely.

My helper packed up for me so I didn't have to do much bending and barely any lifting.  We loaded up the car (she loaded the car) and we went to the lunch they provided for us.  By this point it was like noon, and I was getting very tired.  My breasts were feeling really heavy and I needed to get home so I could take some medicine.

I've kind of been slowly trying to do more in the way of bending/twisting, and use my abs to sit up in bed instead of the log-roll out of bed... stuff like that.  So... they're sore.  It may have also had to do with the leggings being low-waist and bugging me at the tummy incision.  I don't know.  I've really gotta figure out what to do about colder-weather clothing.

I'm a little discouraged because I really thought that by 3 weeks, I'd be able to do more.  I didn't think I'd need meds.  I want to be super crazy awesome healer-upper-lady and instead I'm just kind of right where your average bear should be a this point-- overachiever left nipple and all.  I am not yet doing intricate you poses and seeing that fabulous six-pack.  Gosh.

I think I'm also missing the cuddly-snuggly nature of my relationship with my husband.  I just want to be able to lie next to him all spoony and stuff, or to be able to wake up in the morning and roll over and snuggle up on him.  We fall asleep holding hands most nights, just because touch is comforting (and because we're so adorably cute like otters).

  I'm not gonna lie, we're very touchy hands-on people, and I miss that so much it almost makes me cry.  He's out of town this evening and it is making me totally weepy; I miss him so much. It's got to also be difficult for him, I mean, he likes to hug and love on me too... and he doesn't know what he can and can't do and he doesn't want to hurt me.

It's totally my fault.  I wanted to do this.  I did this, and there are no regrets on having had these procedures because moving forward, it will be wonderful.  I just feel like I'm robbing him of intimacy and solace of snuggling and the release and security of being held.  I want to do whatever it is I need to do so that I can heal up and be more comfortable, and go back to being the snuggly wife I was before.

For your viewing pleasure, more gratuitous otter love:

We'd like to plan a trip to go spend some time together (did I mention my surgery was 2 days before our wedding anniversary?), he's got some vacation time that he needs to use up by the end of the year.  I don't know what I'll be ready for in 3 weeks.  I don't know if I'll still tire easily, if I'll be able to pull a suitcase, I just don't know.  We'd talked about going to Boston to see a friend, then maybe to NYC for a couple of days and staying somewhere nice, seeing the sights at Christmas time.  We don't have to decide now, we can be totally spontaneous and go where the wind takes us, or we can just stay at home (you know, like we've been doing for the past three weeks).

I just need to be patient, and do what I'm supposed to do, and let myself heal.

Ohhhhh why is patience so hard?

Aaaaaand look what I found, while looking for a cute little smart-ass picture to post about patience... something that actually means something, and is quite appropriate.