Day 24: Maternity Pants are the bomb!

So today's "reason to wake up" was a nail appointment.  I was looking forward to trying out the maternity pants and people, they were absolutely the BEST.

None of that wacky buttoning/waistline business.  The tummy panel slid right up over my compression garment and stayed up!  I wore a baggy hoodie and Uggs with it, so I was not at the height of fashion (unless you count "Grunge"), but I was indeed comfy : )

Come to think of it, it's quite unfortunate that Uggs were a post-Grunge fashion item.  They'd have fit right in!

I have felt all-around well.  No need for anything above and beyond Motrin.

The rest of the day is pretty nothing-to-report until dinner time rolled around.  My nails look lovely and I watched a lot of America's Next Top Model since they were running a style marathon on whatever channel that is.  I stripped the sheets off the bed all by myself (very slowly, it's not a contest) and got them into the washer & dryer.  Slow and steady won that race.

So me and Mr. Right went to my favorite suburban Mexican restaurant because it's Thursday, and they make my favorite dish ONLY on Thursdays.

I went to the bathroom, and upon peeling my layers off, I noticed a little bit of "weeping" from my tummy incision was showing through my compression garment. I went ahead and took the garment down and looked at the incision... yep.  The part Doc had thought might be an infection was definitely looking angry.  It wasn't oozing or anything, just kind of looked like the skin was separating a bit and there was a bit of... goo.. that didn't look right.  Since I started antibiotics last night, I know we're already fighting whatever's in there, but I thought I should let Doc know that the situation appeared worse.

I sent him a text (as he requests his patients do if they have questions) explaining the situation, asking if I should go ahead and Neosporin the area.  He said yes, and to not put Scarguard on it until it looks normal again.  SO... back to the gauze-and-ointment for that part of the incision.

I'm still glad I asked!  I took a picture of it for myself, so I can take a pic tomorrow and compare.  Just so I can know if it's getting better or worse.  Just for me.  Possibly for the blog if I can figure out a way to host pics elsewhere so they don't just show up and BLAMMO! surprise you out of the blue.

I know I would NOT want to see someone else's infected incision unless I specifically chose to.

Once I figure that, I'll post some other more in-depth images as well.

Day 24 was, overall, a feelin' good kinda day.  See ya on Day 25!

Day 23: 3-week checkup, and wheeee, maternity pants!

I must be honest.  After I wrote the Day 22 blog, Mr. Right called and I chatted with him about his day, then about how I was feeling with this healing, and how much I missed our intimacy and stuff.  I was upset.  I cried when I hung up the phone.  I was in bed, and I was frustrated, and I was wondering what happened to the way I felt last week?  Why did I feel like I was making so much progress?  Why do I now feel like I'm standing still or regressing?  UGH.  Why can't I be healing-superwoman?

So today I had my 3-week checkup to get ready for today.

I woke up, ate some breakfast, and did some playing-on-the-internet.  I had to figure out what I was wearing to the Doc.

It's chilly, and until yesterday I had been wearing a lot of flowy dresses and didn't have to wear pants.  The long leggings I wore yesterday were suspect since my midsection was sore after Career Day, so I didn't want to go with those again.  I settled for some looser capri length yoga pants that were comfy enough.  I went with big-baggy-sweatshirt on top because it was warm and comfy and hid the lovely compression garment sticking out of my pants.  I ordered two more compression garments that were due to arrive today, but damn if they had not made their way to my front door.  Of course.

I showered but kind of said "to hell with it" where washing my hair was concerned.  Dry shampoo is my friend!

I was thinking hard about why the wind had gone out of my sails.  I am getting a wider range of motion.  I can squat down and bend enough to pick things up off the floor, or plug stuff into the wall.   It's easier to reach stuff that's high up, so I am doing more reaching.  Maybe my increased abilities, coupled with the fact that the numbness is subsiding and feeling IS coming back, are the culprit.  So maybe I am progressing, it's just that I am in less of the la-la-land than I have been.

I want to be an over-achiever, and to be commended for it.  I want people to be mesmerized with my power to heal and emerge unscathed.  I want to think I'm not "average".  Why?  I don't know.  We talked about impatience yesterday ; )

So once I got to Doc's, I took off all my cozy layers and put on the soft pink rosy exam gown.  It's like being back home.  Ahh.

When you're asked, "So, how are you feeling?" in the doc's office, you can really unload, and unload I did.  He gave me the, "Hey, it's only been 3 weeks!  Everybody always seems to think they'll heal faster than we tell them."

So basically, don't get mad at yourself for not being over-achiever-healer because in reality, you're doing GREAT, silly woman.  My tummy incision was looking red above and below, more than Doc cared to let go without a course of antibiotics.  He said it could be the sutures kind of irritating one another, but there was one spot that was "weeping" a little so he threw me on a course of Bactrim, in case something was going on.  He didn't seem worried, since the redness was so localized.

I asked him about my crazy sensitive nipples, and if it would be okay to try putting baby teething gel or something on them, just to desensitize them.  He said I could definitely try, and to report back.

Since there was a prescription being called in, you might be able to guess the next stop of the train, TARGET!  This is also my pharmacy, so I actually had a pure reason for the visit ; )  Once I made sure they'd received the faxed prescription info, I shopped while they filled it.

First stop, baby teething gel.

Next stop, comfier pants.
I shopped around the workout section, but nothing looked very waist-comfy.  Everything's made to hold up to the rigors of working out.  Meh.  I made my way to the pajamas, but nothing there was really outta-the-house-presentable.  I went to the normal clothes, looking for some track pants or something, but in my pickiness, I snubbed my nose at velour.

Like a beacon in the night, I saw it.  LIZ LANGE MATERNITY.  Ohmygah, super stretchy waists!  YES!  I found a pair of maternity jeans, tried them on, and they worked like a charm.  They don't look like "mom jeans" (which is like, the height of irony, right?), they're long enough, hooray!

As long as I wear a shirt long enough, it hides the little lycra panel so it's alllll goooood.

Mr. Right was home when I got home, and we ate dinner in.  He fired up the fireplace, and I snuggled up really close to it and took some of the prescription meds and melted into the rest of the night with him watching Duck Dynasty.  Oh, sweet soft fleece pajama pants.  Snuggly house-shoes.

I felt so much better at the end of today.  I'm going to try and do a little bit of desk work tomorrow and finish up a couple of projects.  I also have a nail appointment, where I will wear my fashionable new jeans.

: )

Day 22: Career Day, I think I overdid it again maybe... and I miss being able to snuggle.

So I woke up at 7:30ish this morning because I had committed (a while back) to doing a career day presentation at a local school.  It was really cold outside, so I had to rethink my wardrobe choice, which was okay but I also had to reach up really high in the closet to get to the bin my comfy sweater was packed in... which probably wasn't the best idea ever.  Ouch.  I went with the big comfy sweater and some athletic leggings (they're all black, so they looked fashiony enough).

We had packed the car last night so that there would be no carrying-of-stuff this morning, I knew Mr. Right needed to snooze in a while because he had a long day of work travel ahead of him.  I got ready, and with it being cold, my left nipple was REALLY being crazy and sensitive, so I took some Motrin on the way out the door.   Seriously, left nipple, you have GOT to calm the heck down.

My fantastic helper friend met me at the school and took care of the heavy-thing-transporting, got us checked in, and helped me set up everything in the room.  We walked back to the cafeteria where the students were assembling, listened to the opening presentation, then walked back to the classroom where we'd set up.

No, I am not a professional cupcake model, but this blog is anonymous so that's what you get, lol.

I talked to three separate "classes", each of which lasted 30 minutes.  I stood up and talked, I sat down and talked, whatever felt comfortable.  It didn't involve a great deal of physical effort, really.  The kids were GREAT, I loved talking about my job, and my fantastic helper friend threw out candy whenever someone made a good comment or asked a question, so the flow of conversation was lovely.

My helper packed up for me so I didn't have to do much bending and barely any lifting.  We loaded up the car (she loaded the car) and we went to the lunch they provided for us.  By this point it was like noon, and I was getting very tired.  My breasts were feeling really heavy and I needed to get home so I could take some medicine.

I've kind of been slowly trying to do more in the way of bending/twisting, and use my abs to sit up in bed instead of the log-roll out of bed... stuff like that.  So... they're sore.  It may have also had to do with the leggings being low-waist and bugging me at the tummy incision.  I don't know.  I've really gotta figure out what to do about colder-weather clothing.

I'm a little discouraged because I really thought that by 3 weeks, I'd be able to do more.  I didn't think I'd need meds.  I want to be super crazy awesome healer-upper-lady and instead I'm just kind of right where your average bear should be a this point-- overachiever left nipple and all.  I am not yet doing intricate you poses and seeing that fabulous six-pack.  Gosh.

I think I'm also missing the cuddly-snuggly nature of my relationship with my husband.  I just want to be able to lie next to him all spoony and stuff, or to be able to wake up in the morning and roll over and snuggle up on him.  We fall asleep holding hands most nights, just because touch is comforting (and because we're so adorably cute like otters).

  I'm not gonna lie, we're very touchy hands-on people, and I miss that so much it almost makes me cry.  He's out of town this evening and it is making me totally weepy; I miss him so much. It's got to also be difficult for him, I mean, he likes to hug and love on me too... and he doesn't know what he can and can't do and he doesn't want to hurt me.

It's totally my fault.  I wanted to do this.  I did this, and there are no regrets on having had these procedures because moving forward, it will be wonderful.  I just feel like I'm robbing him of intimacy and solace of snuggling and the release and security of being held.  I want to do whatever it is I need to do so that I can heal up and be more comfortable, and go back to being the snuggly wife I was before.

For your viewing pleasure, more gratuitous otter love:

We'd like to plan a trip to go spend some time together (did I mention my surgery was 2 days before our wedding anniversary?), he's got some vacation time that he needs to use up by the end of the year.  I don't know what I'll be ready for in 3 weeks.  I don't know if I'll still tire easily, if I'll be able to pull a suitcase, I just don't know.  We'd talked about going to Boston to see a friend, then maybe to NYC for a couple of days and staying somewhere nice, seeing the sights at Christmas time.  We don't have to decide now, we can be totally spontaneous and go where the wind takes us, or we can just stay at home (you know, like we've been doing for the past three weeks).

I just need to be patient, and do what I'm supposed to do, and let myself heal.

Ohhhhh why is patience so hard?

Aaaaaand look what I found, while looking for a cute little smart-ass picture to post about patience... something that actually means something, and is quite appropriate.

Three Weeks! Day 21... well, I was really tired. Also. I shaved my legs!

Day 21 was yesterday, but I went to bed without posting.

I woke up at about 8:30 (why? why did I wake up?), washed up, walked around, then I got pulled into a long marathon of that show "Long Island Medium" where the chatty lady talks to dead people and reassures live people that their loved ones "on the other side" are okay and happy and with them.

I've lost some loved ones.  I was watching it all fixated and crying like a baby because I wanted to hear those things about MY people on the other side.  Also, she is like the queen of bump-it hair.  You cannot stop looking at that HAIR.  There should be a whole show in just Theresa doing her hair.  You can't help but love this woman in all her sweet obnoxiousness.  Listening to her talk is my fave.

Then my friend called.  She had a breast reduction scheduled, but was having a doctor debacle and some real scheduling complications and just needed to talk, so we chatted like forever.  We talked about my procedures, cost, my outcome and recovery, etc.  Just a lot of surgery talk.  Then, of course, we talked a little about Long Island Medium because it's an excellent conversational topic.

I decided since my cats were gonna starve without my help, I needed to go grab some cat food.  I got home, fed them, fed myself, and holy cow I was all of a sudden just EXHAUSTED.  I sat down on the couch zoning out for like 45 minutes, kind of nodding off here and there, then Mr. Right got home.

I laid down for a nap around 4:30 and woke up at like 8:00 pm.  What the heck?  All I did was go out for freakin' cat food and talk on the phone.  Anyway, my body was telling me "sleep" so I did.

Mr. Right was hungry, but I kind of just wanted to sleep and wasn't hungry, but we needed to go to the store, and I should eat dinner.  Then it was "What do you want to eat?" and "I don't know", so I told him just wherever was fine, since I wasn't hungry.

We went to Hooters, and it was really really loud since it was Monday night football, so I ordered a couple of drinks to take the edge off.  That was probably the best decision I made allll day.  We hit the grocery store, then came home and he helped me load up the car.  I had a Career Day presentation the following day at a middle school.

I also showered in the evening because I knew there was no way I'd be able to be somewhere the next morning by 8:15 if the morning had to involve showering.  Pants are still not comfy, so I planned to wear a dress, so I SHAVED MY LEGS!  For the first time in 3 weeks.

Finally utilizing that shower chair to actually sit on, I shaved my legs.  Life is slowly getting back to normal!  Reaching the left side of my left leg was a challenge, because I'm right-handed.  That's probably the least-shaven part but the rest of my legs were pretty smooth.  I even had my sweet husband put lotion on them after he painted me up with Scar-Guard.

For whatever reason, I had the hardest time getting to sleep last night.  Maybe because of the 4-hour nap?

Day 20: Went to a movie, chatted with a surgery buddy

So, Day 20 was largely uneventful as far as my surgical recovery.  We had planned to go to a movie at noon, in the big comfy reclinery theater where I knew I'd be comfortable.

We bough tickets the night before, and Mr. Right decided we needed to get to the theater really early and stand in line since it was a new movie.  This required an orchestrated wake-up time so I could shower and stuff, get my Scar-Guard painted on, get comfy in wearing something, blah blah blah.  That worked out well, yay us.

Well, we got there about 40 minutes early.  There was no line, and upon entering the theater we found that about 12 other people had the same "let's get there really early" thought.  SO... a good 40 minutes of random movie theater songs/commercials.  The movie was great, and we went home.

I got home and my daughter said that while we were gone, my neighbor J had come by and said she heard I'd had surgery, and she was making dinner for us tonight!  My daughter, being a teenager, had encrypted the message so that I wasn't totally sure what was up so I walked over to J's house.

She was busy chopping and cooking and slicing and dicing, all for us.  SO SWEET!

I stayed and chatted with her (and her husband), and while it was cooking she showed me around her house.  Such a sweetie.  I'll have to find something really, really nice to do for her.  The dinner was delicious-- she made us a pasta dish with fresh herbs from her garden, and a beautiful fresh fruit salad all arranged cute on a platter, and cheesy bread.

Once we had eaten, i was kind of done for the day.  TIRED... so I laid down in bed.

A friend of mine has also undergone some surgery recently-- she had a "lower body lift".  They removed/restructured parts of her abdomen (all the way around, "belt line"), butt and thighs.  I texted her to make sure she was up, then gave her a call and we had a nice conversation. It's good to talk to someone a few weeks behind me, and to be able to tell her about the little things I did to help, and help her know that it'll get better every day.

: )

Day 19: Life without drains, still a smidge itchy, and my incisions look angry.

So today I woke up all grumpy and crampy and such.  I woke up late (it's the weekend, who cares?) and couldn't find anyone in the house... which is totally what you wanna find when you wake up all grumpy and woe-is-me.

I'd survived my first overnight period + compression garment experience, so that was a definite plus.


I got up, made some oatmeal (in the meantime, calling to figure out where the heck my family was), then decided I really just wasn't hungry so I stuck it in the fridge.  I took some motrin to help with the crampy business.

As I tend to do at least once a day, I checked myself out in the mirror to see what all my incisions and holes look like, and how I'm looking in general.  The bruisey-color in my breasts is really settling to the bottom of them... they're totally normally colored on top, but then the bottom of them look all reddish-purplish (the itching is subtle, but not nearly as ridiculous as it was yesterday).  On my abdomen, most of it is returning to its normal "really pale" color.  A good centimeter or so above and below my tummy tuck incision, the skin is also realllly red.  Almost angry looking red. It was that color when I was in to have my drains removed and Doc saw it, so I'm assuming it's okay and just part of the healing process.  I see no signs of infection (nothing oozing, no puffines or pain) so I'm not alarmed.

The holes where my drains were: these are kind of crusting over well, I've had gauze on them since the doc appointment, but changed the dressing today even though I didn't shower.  I can't handle the thought of 2-day old drain-hole-ooze-gauze.  Yuck.  I cut a mini-pad in half and taped it over the holes, which seems to be working.

It's a whole new world when you can just wear normal clothes and not worry about finding a place to hide drains!  HOORAY!

Also, my college football team had what can only be described as a "totally kickass" day today. THAT WAS AWESOME.

The kids were otherwise occupied, so Mr. Right and I went out for a lovely suburban Mexican restaurant dinner.  I even had a margarita (I haven't had any of the prescription drugs today, so I decided to go for it)!

We have plans to et up and see the new James Bond flick at noon tomorrow, so I'm calling it an early night.  I need my 10 hours of sleep, plus some time to shower and stuff in the morning.

Sometimes, it's like planning as thought I'm an infant...lol.  Need lots of sleep, need to get cleaned up, need to take care of the uncontrollable mess leaking out of me... then we can leave the house.

I'm super excited-- especially after the evening of chips, dip and fajitas-- to be cleared to start working out.  I don't want to walk away from this fabulous tummy tuck operation only to develop another gut.

Nighty Night!

Day 18: Super itchy and DRAINS ARE OUT!

Today is a turning point in my recovery journey!  I was producing less than 25ml of fluid per 24 hour period from each drain... so I called Doc's office, gave them my numbers, and they told me I could come in and have the drains removed today at 1:15!!!!

Time for a good old fashioned happy dance!

So I had lunch with my friend at around 11:30, we chatted for a long time and I'm glad, because it made the time pass quickly.  I also enjoy talking with her, so you know, double bonus.  We were done, so then I drove around a little bit and headed to Doc's office.

What Drain Removal is like:

Doc didn't even have me get gowned up, since I had a flowy dress on that I could just hike up for him to have abdominal access.  I laid back on the exam table, and tried not to look.  He clipped the stitches holding the drain in place, then gave me a "1-2-3" and pulled it out.  It didn't hurt, it just felt realllly weird... so I said, "Ok, that is the weirdest thing I have ever felt in my life.  I feel like you just pulled a slimy piece of spaghetti out of me!"

Evidently that's what everyone says.  Or some say it feels like a snake slithering out, but yuck.  I keep conjuring up the image of a pool overfilled with eels or something.  Just a slimy-noodle-pulling feel... from a place inside you that your'e totally not used to really feeling anything.

So then I told him when he pulled out the other one, to let me see it before he dropped it in the trash.  I was curious to know if it looked like the one I found in my online image search for surgical drains, lol!  Indeed it did not.  

The one I found online looked like this, with the flat part being what's inside you collecting your goo:

The one I had looked like this, with channels along the side instead of the little holes.  Doc said the ones with holes get clogged up too easily... Mine actually reminded me of a straw.  The sides are kind of fluted:

 

They weren't icky or bloody or gooey or anything.  So, while very strange, that was way easier than I expected.  I thought it would hurt at least a little.  The second strangest feeling in the world is moving around once those drains are out...lol.

He put gauze over the holes where the tubes came out, and taped it down.  I just need to keep gauze or a maxi-pad over them in case they leak goo a little, and that's about it.

I have my 3-week appointment next week, so at that time we'll determine when I'm allowed to take a bath.  My assumption is that those holes need to seal up before I can sit in water : )

Itchy Boobs

My breasts are starting to un-swell noticeably.  They are also starting to itch like CRAZY... which is funny because the skin on the bottom of my breasts is numb, yet I still feel like it's itchy.  If I try and scratch it, I can't feel a damn thing.  Evidently it's those nerves kind of trying to re-lay their map and figure out what's going on.  I hope they learn soon, it's driving me bonkers!!!!

I'll try some cool washcloths to see if I can get any relief.  I promise not to claw my new cute breasts off.